A little Advice

I'm not dispensing, I'm requesting. Here's my question:

How do I get Claire to play by herself for any time at all without just putting her in front of the TV? She has an inability to entertain herself. She has way too many toys and will only touch them if someone is sitting next to her, engaging with her while she plays. It's ridiculous, and in a few weeks, completely impossible! I have been attempting to make her more independent in preparation for Jude's arrival. But I can't, for the life of me, get her to leave me alone to get anything done. Don't get me wrong, I DO NOT give her my undivided attention all day. But when I'm busy and I ask her to play by herself for a little while, she follows me around whining or deliberately provokes negative attention by getting in trouble. (She's in time out right now for climbing the DVD rack-something I tell her not to do at least twice/day!) I use language like "Claire's special play time" or "Mommy needs a break." I set timers, lock myself in rooms, all to no avail.

I need some mom wisdom. Tricks of the trade. Something. Anything!

The Weather and Midwives

IT WAS 107 DEGREES YESTERDAY!

I call that super unfair when you're 36 weeks pregnant. Today it's only 90, but super humid, so I got in the kiddie pool with Claire this morning at 10 am. I was a little self-conscious because our only yard is the front yard, but I got over it quickly because it felt so nice!

Only 4 more weeks to go till D-day! I'm excited, but a little overwhelmed, because I still feel like I have a lot to do to get the house ready for Jude.

For those of you who don't know, we're having him at home with a midwife. Claire was also a planned homebirth, but I was transfered to the hospital at the very end because my water had been broken for too long (36 hours!) We're confident that this time we won't need a transfer. Our midwife has never had to send a 2nd time mom to the hospital, and she says she won't let me ruin her record! haha! I have been receiving regular chiropractic care this time around to try and make sure everything is ideal for this little man to come nice and efficiently. Having experienced both the midwifery model of care as well as common obstetrical practice with Claire's birth, I can say that the difference was like night and day! At home, I spent the first 9 cm of labor in relative comfort, surrounded by calm, quiet support. My comfort plummeted and my stress sky-rocketed as I was ushered into the hospital, hooked up to all the monitoring equipment (and then bothered continuously because the monitor had slipped and wasn't recording), shot full of pitocin, and yelled at by the OB!

To anyone who is pregnant, or will be pregnant, I warmly encourage you to check out midwifery care as one of your options! Our insurance is covering the birth at in-network rates (90% paid for!) and in many areas midwives also practice in hospitals, for those of you who want/need the reassurance of that setting.

Some more stats on Midwifery for those that are interested:

• Midwife means "with woman". It comes from an English translation of the German word "mit wife" and for many centuries has been used to describe the individual who was "with women" in childbirth. Midwives have been the primary caretakers of birthing women and their newborn babies throughout history. The oldest known reference to midwives can be found in the Old Testament in the book of Genesis.

• Midwives consider birth a natural event in women's lives. Midwifery is based on the belief that childbirth is a natural, healthy process and that most women are fully capable of giving birth. Midwives see pregnancy as part of the full spectrum of life's experiences, and they believe women have the right to a fulfilling, as well as a safe, childbirth experience.

• Midwifery care involves judicious use of technology. Women avoid the risks, discomfort, and disruption that unnecessary procedures impose, yet have the opportunity to use available technology if needed.

• Midwives practice in hospitals, free-standing birth centers, and homes.

• The safety of midwifery care has been established by a large body of research. In 1998, the National Center for Health Statistics released its findings that the risk of infant mortality occurring in the first 28 days of life was 33% lower for births attended by certified nurse midwives. It also found that the risk of a low birthweight infant was 31% lower.

• Out of hospital births for low-risk pregnancies attended by midwives result in caesarean section rates of only 3-4% versus a national average of 19% in 2000. (According to a 2009 CDC study, the current national c-section rate is actually 31.8% and has risen every year for the last 11 years)

Resources:

http://www.expectantmothersguide.com/library/philadelphia/EPHmidwives.htm

http://www.cfmidwifery.org/pdf/cesarean2x.pdf

http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/nvsr/nvsr57/nvsr57_12.pdf

http://www.washingtonmidwives.org/midwife_reasons.shtml#top

Claire's 2nd Birthday

The more you know...

"Where's the Pregnancy Weight Going? It’s pretty much a given that you won’t be giving birth to a 25-to-35-pound baby. And that’s a very good thing. Want to know where the rest of those pounds settle? For a 30-pound weight gain, they’ll be distributed approximately like this:

Baby: 7.5 pounds

Placenta: 1.5 pounds

Amniotic fluid: 2 pounds

Uterine enlargement: 2 pounds

Maternal breast tissue: 2 pounds

Maternal blood volume: 4 pounds

Fluids in maternal tissue: 4 pounds

Maternal fat stores: 7 pounds"

(from what to expect when you're expecting)


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Letter of Resignation

Dear Claire,

This letter serves as notification of my intent to vacate the position of your mother, effective immediately. I find that I am no longer able to suffer through your inappropriate, unprovoked treatment. The incident today at Old Navy was the last straw. I realize you wanted to take the ball home, but it was explained to you prior to ever receiving said item that it was to be left in the store upon completion of our business there. Crying would have been a response I could have easily understood and accommodated. But to scream and scream, and then throw yourself prone in the middle of the street is an unreasonable retaliation. The fact that I had to spank you-twice-in front of the construction workers just to get you safely out of the road is unacceptable. And all this while I am way too pregnant and it is way too hot, and my hands were full trying to push baby Chloe in the stroller while she waited patiently. But then, you made a bad situation worse. I get to the car to discover that someone had parked so close on the left side that I cannot open your door or mine. Do you help me by climbing nicely over the seat from the right and getting in the car seat? Of course not! You force me to drag you into your seat kicking, snotting, and screaming like I'm murdering you! Trying to wrestle you into your seat and strap you in safely was almost more than I was capable of physically and emotionally. I was literally dripping with sweat and boiling with anger by the time I was satisfied that you would be safe for the drive home. And then to just decide to stop acting like a wild animal, smile at me, and ask me for a snack was just cruel. Oh and then, of course, there was the moment when I was putting the stroller in the trunk and discovered that we had inadvertently stolen the notorious ball that began the whole mess. Too much to bear!

So, far all these reasons I feel it necessary to take a break. I have enjoyed our time together, and would be willing to consider reapplying for my old position should circumstances change and the grievances I listed be addressed. Thank you for you time.

Respectfully,

Your Mommy

Two years already!

Claire's 2nd birthday is Friday. Wow. As I'm scrambling with last minute planning she is starting to get excited. She sings happy birthday to herself and loves to tell people she's "TWO!!!"

She had her two year Dr. visit yesterday. The Dr. was asking me the standard milestone questions: does she count to 5? Yes, she counts to 10, except she really has something against including 4. Does she know her colors? Yes, but she likes to give the wrong color first when you ask just to make sure you're paying attention. It went on like this for a while with all yeses, then she asked, "does she peddle a tricycle?" uhm, well I think she could, but she can't reach the peddles. "does she cut paper with scissors?" uhm, I have never given her scissors. It never seemed like a safe idea to me. She is barely done being 1! I think she had moved up an age on her question list cause I had said yes to all the two year old questions. She did that to me at her one year check up also, but it always surprises me.

Below is a picture of what Claire is doing right now while I write this. She says "hi everybody!"


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

August and Everything After

(Warning: there may be a mini pregnant lady rant to follow)

I have to say, being 30 weeks pregnant and spending the day with a very active two year old in the height of summer is a challenge. I remember when I was preggo with Claire, it was also the summer (she was born Aug 27th) but I was on summer break from grad school and until a month before she was born we lived in a nice apartment complex with air conditioner and a resort-like pool. I used to spend hours sipping decaf lattes by the pool and reading books, then I'd retire to the air conditioned apartment for a nap. HAH! Now, no pool, no air conditioner, no ice maker for iced coffee beverages, no naps (well, not entirely no naps, but far fewer and at the expense of cleaning the toilet or folding the mountains of laundry) and no time for books unless they are of the Hop on Pop variety.

Claire is in a crazy-fun, sometimes beat-your-head-against-the-wall-and-then-go lock-yourself-in-your-room phase. She loves to tell stories about her day. She constantly astounds us with her capacity to understand and explain her world. She also has an uncanny memory for events from months and months ago. She speaks in complete, mostly intelligible sentences (more intelligible to me because I hear them ALL DAY LONG!) I've had to institute a "mommy's taking a break" time occasionally just to stay sane.

Kevin's favorite thing Claire does: She calls him "my daddy." He converted her crib into a toddler bed, and she was so proud to show it off. She told everyone "My daddy made it [for] me!" And speaking of toddler beds, Claire transitioned to hers without so much as one single issue. I was all prepared for a few nights of up and down, but it was all unnecessary. She is such a sleeper! She goes down between 7 & 8 and sleeps until 8 or 8:30. When she wakes up, she calls for me, "Mommy, I'm awake!" from the edge of her bed and waits for me to come in before climbing down. It's unreal!

I am not ready to lose this sleep!!! So, I'm trying to capitalize on the time I have left before Jude arrives.

Here's a few pictures from our latest visit to the beach: